The happiest day of our lives, for sure, was when Josiah Michael Holland was born. I’m glad to share our birth experience with everyone. I’m also a little nervous because I know everyone has their own opinion about how they think you should bring your child into this world, but our story is OUR STORY!
It was was that day! We arrived at the hospital at 8:00 on Wednesday, March 29th to start the induction process.
Why induction one week early? It was my choice and I chose induction because I wanted my doctor to be the one to deliver Josiah. She wouldn’t have been able to if we had waited. I was healthy and the baby was healthy enough for an early delivery.
The process started at midnight with the Cervidil induction to prepare me for Pitocin induction in the morning. It was a super long night simply because I was so nervous and anxious. The night was going well though and the cervidil was doing its job.
They started the pitocin at 6:00 am Thursday, March 30th. We were so nervous because we knew it could either get labor rolling quickly or slow it down dramatically. It instantly started contractions that progressed very strongly and quickly. Since my contractions were so strong and close together, the doctor advised that I go ahead and get my epidural. My epidural was put in around 9 am and then they broke my water. So, now the waiting begins. I was feeling fantastic despite the lack of sleep. But everytime the nurses checked me I wasn’t dilated past one centimeter. So they kept increasing the Pitocin. At 3:00 that afternoon, I had only made it to two centimeters. Three hours later, at 5:00 I had only made it to two and a half. We were bummed and the epidural started wearing off. Around 6:00 I was in so much pain and they gave me more meds through my epidural that wasn’t working. The doctor told me that I was in that small percentage of women who’s body got use to the epidural and it no longer worked for them. I was having strong regular contractions but just wasn’t dilating. The baby was so low, I felt him being pushed up against me so strongly with each contraction. He was ready but my body wasn’t. I talked with my doctor about opting for a cesarean and she said she would definitely do that for me if that is what I wanted. I told her I would give it a couple more hours to see if I progressed anymore. Well, after a few more hours, I hadn’t progressed. I just felt strongly that a cesarean was the best option for me. After he was born the doctor agreed because she realized how low he was and how it would have potentially been dangerous if we had waited since I was failing to progress.
It was around 8:45 p.m. and we were super excited and super nervous because our baby would be here in the next 30 minutes for sure. Jonathan kissed me as they wheeled me off to prep for surgery. The surgery prep was terrifying to me because of all the bright lights and I knew I was about to have major surgery. Lol. After they numbed me from the chest down I couldn’t breathe very well and was extremely shaky, so I was in a small panic. I needed Jonathan there to help me but for some reason, the nurse hadn’t brought him in yet. My doctor began the surgery and I still didn’t have my husband. Talk about scary. I just kept asking for him as they were cutting me. I just took some slow breaths to concentrate on breathing and not passing out. I saw someone rush around the corner and I recognized Jonathan’s eye in his O.R. attire and I just lost it with relief and happiness. He got me through that surgery with his excitement and confidence about what was happening, but I on the other hand, was a wreck, emotionally and physically. The ten minutes of the doctors getting my baby out felt like an hour. Then my doctor called my name and said, “Ok Emily, you’re about to feel a lot of pressure because I am about to pull your baby out.” The anesthesiologist said, “Take a deep breath because you’re about to be a mommy!” Jonathan was right by my side rubbing my head and holding my hand. Then we heard the sweetest cry ever! Josiah was here! Jonathan stood up and took some pictures of him as they held him up in the air then he kissed me and went to cut the cord and watch them weigh and measure him. Since my chest was so numb and I was crying, I couldn’t get enough breath or strength to talk out loud so I just mumbled hoping they would hear me. I was telling Josiah, “I love you Josiah!” “Happy Birthday baby!” “That’s your daddy beside you!” “You sound so beautiful!” “Thank you, Jesus!” The only person that heard me was the anesthesiologist, he never left my side. Then, I heard Jonathan singing the song to Josiah that he sang the entire time I was pregnant and he stopped crying and was completely calm. Talk about losing it. I lost it. Jonathan brought Josiah around the corner for me to see him for the first time and kiss those fat cheeks from the sonogram pic that I couldn’t wait to see in person. He was perfect to me.
This was literally the happiest moment of my entire life! Nothing else in the world will compare to this moment.